5 more days left

Hi everyone! I'm very very very sorry for my laziness with this blog. But maybe it's more rewading to read these markings once they are published if I publish them this seldom? ;) Haha. Anyways.

It's winter in Finland now and we just started our holidays. So long waited Xmas eve is after five days. How exciting! We even have got some snow here, and the temperature is about -20 every night. Just in time I have found a new hobby - Postcrossing. It's a system where you send and get cards to and from all over the world. Me and my sissy went to the town and bought some cards (nearly 40!!) today. I've never realized how beautiful cards are. I noticed myself picking one card, then seeing another, picking it too and so on. That's how we got that 40 cards afterall. Gosh. Now I should write five cards to different countries: Estonia, Uruguay, Germany, the Netherlands and the USA. Or actually four, since I've already written a card that goes to Germany. Luckily I have a lot of free time now so that I can write all those cards in a few days. Then I can start so receive some!

I have also created my very own account to Youtube. There you can find some of my recordings. Oh, and you know what! I bought a digital piano last weekend! With my own money... Geez, I don't have anything anymore... But it really was worth it. I have never seen or heard as beautiful sound as my lovely Clás (piano's name ;)) has. He's great.

But people, I never sent any photographs from our trip to Budapest. I'm sorry about that too. Therefore I decided to add some of them here now. I guess it's OK? Well, there you are. And everyone - have nice time waiting for Santa! <:)

Just some great news...

...that I had to post to my blog. It's been a while since my last post... I'm sorry about that. I'm just so lazy with this. It's probably clear, for I have three own blogs and three dogs' blogs to update regularly. You just cannot be on time everywhere.

But let's go to the news: I'm going to Hungary again! Please don't ask me why, because I have no clue. Or of course I know why ('cause I want to!), but how I got my mom to come with me. So yes, this time I'll be going only with mom. And to Budapest, not to Siófok or Balaton at all. Although I will push my mom to take a train with me and do a one-day trip to the "contryside", you know. To our own place. I wish we could visit the Csorbas, too, but that's not possible. Unfortunately. Anyway it's more than marvellous to go and see the autumn of Hungary - it seems to be such beautiful, at least in the photographs I've seen. It's kind of different comparing to Finland, as we have already had snow here. Yak!

I'm actually having my autumn breaks of school at the moment. And as you probably guess, I've just spent it in front of my laptop. Not that I haven't done anything here - I absolutely have: I changed the layout of our website, and now I am refreshing this personal blog and my Twitter profile, too. And as for Twitter, did you notice that black poll on the right hand side? I found this funny, little widget on Twitter and decided to add it here so that I wouldn't have to refresh this so often, but you guys could still know what's happening here. On second thoughts, I'm pretty sure there's no one following this blog, but whatever. It's just for my own fun that I'm writing here.

I suppose I'm ending this post now, but I'll be here again after one week, since I made sure our hotel has this wireless Internet connection ;) This lovely little computer travels with me again. It always does. So see you then - there'll be many photos again!

No-life for the others, life from my point of view

Hi! I just came in from a walk with my dog and I have to say - what a weather! I don't know if I have even seen or felt weather like that, it was fabulous. There were some very heavy clouds, you could almost feel them touching your back with their electricity - and the colour of them! I guess there's not even a word to describe the colour of them but it was something between lilac, blue, black, grey and purple. Just fantastic. But no thunder, no storm, just couple raindrops falling down from the massive sky. I really enjoyed the walk. The only thing I'm more interested about is that where the other people were. There was absolutely no-one outside. Like time would have been stopped. There were no humen, no animals, no cars. Even the lights in all houses were switched off. And I can tell you - that really was weird, since it wasn't that late. What a pity, I was the only person who was outside to enjoy that moment.

I haven't really been here, I mean, in Blogger. Maybe it's because I'm a bit no-life again, like I knew I would, after visiting Hungary again. I don't go anywhere, I don't do anything...I just am. Well okay, I dream about living in Hungary some day, or even visiting it soon again. I have got my enthusiasm to study Hungarian again, so this no-lifeness has been good for me, too. Last weekend I went on over ten pages in my exercise book. I don't know, I'm just a girl who dreams her life away. Maybe it's not good, maybe it is. Maybe it's just a way to manage.

I have to go to bed now, but if someone's interested in this kind of dream world, please start from listening to a Hungarian band called Nox. You find some great songs of them from Youtube, like, Legyen, Még egy perc, Időntúl and Javítsd a hibát. And making myself more no-life: I sing all the songs of the album every day - yes, in Hungarian! It's a whole fun!

In the end

Gosh I have to kill my conscience. I trapped on it again, this time it was cds. We bought four cds from Tesco yesterday, all with label "Made for Hungary". Because none of us had never seen that kind of marking before, we started to think if we could export the cds to Finland at all. It said made for Hungary. Not made for Finland or other countries.

As everyone who really knows me probably already guesses, at that point I was all worried and almost saw our family sitting in customs jail so my dad asked the salesman about the label. He obviously couldn't speak or understand English, as he paid no attention - just like nothing happened. So we bought them. At Csorba's I surfed on the Internet and found this relieving information: It just meant that the cds were cheaper. Thank God! Now I can listen to Nox and all these Slumdog millionaire -songs. (The book is amazing, btw!)

I remember the day we arrived here (what a surprise I do) and thought that we're going to spend all these ten days in sunny and warm Hungary. Now we only have one day left and I'm afraid we'll be back third time ;) (fourth, but third time here in Csorba's) I just love this place, we all do. The Csorba family hasn't been home very much, though, but it's OK. We already knew where are the best restaurants located and how to rent a car, for example.

Oh yea, we rent a car for two days and visited the beautiful cities of Pécs, Héviz and Szekszárd and this wonderful village of Tihany. I just love Tihany. The view from there...oh. It's something that you have to see with your own eyes. Those are the times when it's difficult to remember that Balaton actually is a lake. Oh, I can't even find the words.

I just have to mention that this place is home. I have to get here again and again. Maybe I'll move here some day. Mom and dad already found out the university cities of Hungary and what I should study. They said I could study Finnish and Hungarian and come here to teach Finnish in university. Not a bad idea! ;)

Anyway, we'll spend the whole day on the beach tomorrow and leave this place early in the morning on Saturday. I'll write more later... It has been lovely to live here with Polish and German guests and I want to thank the Csorba family for this house, for their kindness and ofc, for this Wi-Fi connection ;) Thank you so much!

A change

Hmm... I lied a bit when I told I would write something on our first day out here. I didn't. Not even on the second or on the third day. But now. I just got these Internet keys so that's why.

From where should I start? At least I've understood something. Something has changed. I have changed during these two years. I remember the pain I've felt all this time, but now I feel like I have just wasted my time. I'm glad I came here. Otherwise I would have never got completely over this. Over him.

Still I must confess that I was quite excited this morning as I woke up hearing this loud noise. It was him driving the lawn. At the moment I realized it was him I was completely awake. I looked out of the window to see him the first time in two years (yes, the way this happened was quite different than I though it would be) and there he was. Wearing exactly the same kind of clothes he wore last time, looking exactly the same. The only thing that had changed was his hair - it was a bit longer. Now I've been seeing him a few times and his face is the same, his voice is the same, his look is the same. Even though this feels wonderful, something has changed. Somehow I find myself thinking: 'Is this really him? I spend so many nights and days thinking of him, I cried for him and all? He's the guy?' I don't think I'm in love with him anymore. It's been relieving to notice this, since I don't think my life will be Hell anymore, after coming back to Finland. I hope this won't change during these rest ten days (only ten days! I could live in here!).

We haven't really done anything yet. It's so hot out here, you cannot walk even one kilometer without sweating like never before. But next week we'll rent a car to see other places. Then I can maybe get a few photos, too. Mom has told everyone I've been studying Hungarian and now they all think I can really speak or write. I mean, I can though, but only a couple words! Still it's been great to notice some familiar words from the middle of the sentences and so on. I wish I could speak Hungarian properly some day... I thought I could come here next summer to work in Csorba's! ;) This place is so nice and they are so nice. It would be great to get to know him a bit more - but just like friends do, you know.

I'll be back in here next week, now I have to beat the family in Yatzy and Uno! Szia and greetings from Balatonszéplak! <3>

Is it possible...

...to feel all the emotions at the same time? I bet it is. I'm excited, I'm scared, I'm angry and happy. I feel fine and confused, frustrated and sad. I want to leave the country and still I miss it. I'm also eager to see the Csorba family in Hungary for the first time in two years, but I'm afraid I'll be as out of my mind as I was those two years ago as we came back home. You see? This is it: Don't you worry too early - but I do.

Anyways - I just started my holidays :)) I had my last day at work today (which was kinda relaxing - I had no work to do so I just surfed on the Internet) and we took our cavaliers to the cottage so that my grandparents can take care of them during our trip. Rilla is already taken to its breeder, too.

So we're leaving tomorrow. Somehow I can't even realize it yet. It must be fucking cool to go by plane again - I love it! But there's one thing I'm more scared of than anything: the safety control at the airport! Nothing is as scary as it is. But yea, I have to confess that they've got me once, but I didn't do it on a purpose. I was just a little kid and I had scissors in my hand luggage so that I could have created something fun (u know the things the kids do with notebooks and pencils and a roll of tape for example) on the plane...but they took my bag and told me to get those scissors away from there, which I totally did, all scared. So I've been very careful and scared with those controls ever since, it was traumatic for me.

But I have some good news! I can have my laptop with me in Hungary! Daddy told me that the Csorbas have this wireless connection with the Internet that we can use freely. Wo-hoo! I mean, I wouldn't need to do anything but move my photos to this. And refresh my blog. And facebook. And twitter. Okay, I know I'm addicted, right.

It's kinda hard to realize that you have absolutely nothing to pack on a trip. Believe me, I just got this experience. I do have clothes, though, but they're all horrible! I can't understand how on Earth I have ever happened to buy them. I guess I need to refresh my mind during the vacation, I rly need some new thoughts!

I'll continue this 'mission impossible' - packing. I bet it's already morning before I finish this. If I ever do. I'll post something tomorrow when the big day comes. I'll walk through the gates and see my deep crush from the previous trip - of which I just got over...

...and I just can't hide it.

Gosh I'm excited. I visited the school for choosing my courses today and now after the meeting with the principal...I feel just great. I was able to choose both German and Spain, but not only that I'll try to study Russian which is organized outside the school lessons. I'm glad I can stay in Loviisa so that I won't waste any time sitting on the bus. I also got this list of our books and the list is long ;) I wonder how much all these books will cost...

Have I already told you how amazing place this Flickr is? It's a website for photos and videos, and I have put some of my pics there, too. I was exploring other people's photos when I suddenly found some incredible shots from Hungary. The photos were just wonderful and now I've found out where they were taken at. Yet I haven't found out where exactly in Hungary those places are located, but I wish they weren't too far away from Balaton. I mean, once I'll take my big camera with me, it would be sooooo cool to get shots like them. I'm even more excited!

I kinda shouldn't be here for it's this late now, so I guess I have to go to sleep. I can't believe I'm having only five days left at work - and seven days left until the trip to Hungary! Sorry for this post, I'm just way too excited. Here are some of my shots in the forest yesterday. Thanks for coming with me, Fia! <3>

^ Meet my new friend, Szimón the Stone ;)